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We were happy together once, Bryna, we could be again,' he added
encouragingly.
'With you having me followed and personally avoiding me every
chance you get!' she scorned.
'I've been working late because I had no reason to come home,' Raff
told her quietly. 'But we could start again, tonight --'
'And your "employee"?' she bit out tautly.
He sighed. Til get rid of him. Bryna,' he clasped her hand with his as
it rested on her thigh, 'let's try!'
She was tempted, oh, so tempted; she still loved him in spite of the
bitterness of their marriage. And maybe if they could become close
she could convince him that there never had been anything between
Court and herself. It still distressed her that she was the cause of the
rift in the friendship.
'I'd like to --'
'Then let's do it!' he encouraged firmly.
She looked at him searchingly. 'And what happens the next time I
have to see Court? I do want to do further business with him, you
know.'
Raff's jaw clenched. 'I suppose I'll just have to learn to live with that.
As long as you can assure me nothing is going on between you except
business I'll believe you.'
'You haven't believed me so far,' Bryna reminded him wearily,
wondering if this sort of truce between them could really work, but
like him, doubting their marriage could survive as it was for much
longer.
'My trust has taken a pounding the last few months, that's all,' he
sighed. 'We'll learn to cope with that.'
His trust in her had been damaged. Not his love for her, or his need of
her, only his trust. It wasn't much of a foundation for marriage. But
what else did they have?
T can't sleep with you, Raff,' she looked at him unblinkingly. 'You
see, although you doubt me when I say Court has only ever been a
dear friend to me, I know the truth, and your lack of faith in me has
badly shaken my trust in you!'
He gave an abrupt inclination of his head. 'I understand your reasons
for choosing to keep your own room, but maybe in time even that
physical closeness will come back again. For the moment, we're
starting again from the beginning, like strangers.'
'I think our son or daughter might have something to say about that!'
Raff returned her teasing smile, the two of them sharing a brief
moment of camaraderie. And as he smiled Bryna realised how
strained he had looked until that moment, the leanness of his body
and the lines about his eyes revealing that he was just as unhappy as
she.
'Well, almost like strangers,' he mocked. 'Have I told you how much
being pregnant suits you?' he added huskily.
They both knew he hadn't, that he had rarely spoken to her at all since
her pregnancy began to show. Her blush of pleasure at the
compliment added a glow to her cheeks, and a sparkle to her eyes.
She wasn't to know, as she smiled at him shyly, that Raff's trust in her
would be tested sooner than she would have wished!
Their relationship didn't change overnight; there was still a strain
between them that couldn't be banished no matter how much they
talked andlaughed and spent time together. And they did a lot of those
things during the next few weeks, often managing to lunch together
as well as being together in the evenings.
They were closer to being friends now than they had ever been,
having become lovers so quickly in the first place that they hadn't
really taken the time to get to know each other as well as they
probably should have done. Now they had time to discover the things
they had in common, and surprisingly enough they found that was
quite a lot. Raff even began to discuss his work with her, something
she had thought he would never do.
And yet that underlying strain persisted between them.
It was physical rather than mental, Bryna either withdrawing or
trembling almost uncontrollably if Raff should touch her, and she
could feel his tension if she should accidentally touch him in any way.
They wanted each other.
They had gone back to the beginning, started again, had formed a sort
of friendship, and now they wanted each other so badly it was starting
to affect that very friendship they had striven for.
Bryna was more confused than ever; she had no idea where it would
all end.
But she was grateful that the two of them were at least friends enough
to be able to accept Kate's invitation to dinner in the certainty that
they wouldn't cause any friction by their presence. The young girl had
given them a formal invitation to what she called her belated
moving-dinner-party, and Raff had accepted just as formally.
'I just hope she's learnt to cook since the time she served up rice
pudding and potatoes!' he said ruefully on the drive over to the flat.
'Together!'
Bryna laughed softly at the disgusting concoction. 'How old was she
then?'
'Nine,' he grimaced. 'She was trying to act the "little mother" after
Josey died, and Paul and I ate it because we didn't want to hurt her
feelings.'
Bryna smiled. 'Well, I think she has more of an idea now; she was
very helpful when we all cooked the Christmas dinner.'
'Let's hope so,' her father drawled. 'You look lovely tonight, Bryna.'
He laced the fingers of her right hand with his.
So did he! He had always been handsome to her, but this last few
weeks he had become even more so, so that she only had to look at
him to feel her heart beat faster and her mouth go dry. And in an
evening suit Raff could only be described as devastating! She knew
she was suffering from frustration, that Raff could have been wearing
patched denims and she would still have wanted him, but she couldn't
help the way he made her feel breathless just to look at him.
And his compliment about her own appearance was very welcome.
At nineteen weeks her pregnancy was almost halfway through, and
her waistline had expanded to match that. None of her normal
clothing fitted her any more, and although the maternity wardrobe
Raff had insisted on buying her was very attractive she still didn't feel
exactly glamorous in the flowing blue dress, and she needed Raff's
compliment as a bolster to her flagging self- confidence about the
way she looked to him and others.
Especially when she saw the dress Brenda was wearing! The tall
redhead was very attractive, but even so the low-cut black dress
seemed to be a little old for her eighteen years.
Kate gave her father and Bryna an apologetic grimace as she moved
to pour them a drink. 'I only got it in for the occasion,' she hastened to [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]