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I smiled. "You really don't like to lose, do you?"
She made no reply. Just stared. Examined. Evaluated. I saw a series of
expressions in her eyes and face, but none I could name. They came and went
too quickly: the faintest of ripples in her flesh, a shifting in her eyes.
Nearly nonexistent.
Delilah asked, "What did he say to you to make you so afraid?"
I denied her an answer. I took a step backward, breaking contact with her
blade, and lowered my own. "Go," I told her. "We're done for the day. If you
aren't willing to do what it takes, I don't want to bother."
A multitude of replies crowded her eyes. She made none of them.
I watched her walk away. The anger, the bitterness drained away. I felt oddly
empty.
Empty. And afraid.
"Stop it," she said. "Stop it, Tiger!"
I said nothing. Did nothing. The voice was very distant. I could ignore it.
Did.
"Tig oh, hoolies," she muttered, and then a hand cracked me hard across the
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face.
She is a strong woman, and the blow was heartfelt. I came back to awareness
abruptly, catching her wrist. Realized I sat in the hyort we shared. I blinked
at her, shocked. "What was that for?"
"To bring you back."
"Bring me back from where?"
"From the dream."
"I was dreaming?"
"Not now," she said. "You were awake. But away. As if you returned to
something you'd already experienced." She indicated her head. "Inside."
I felt disoriented. Detached. "I don't understand."
She knelt next to me. Desperation edged her tone. "You have to stop this. This
dream-walking."
I frowned, baffled. "Why?"
Del pulled her wrist out of my hand. "Because it's changing you."
"Changing me! How?" I noticed then that it was nearing sundown. I couldn't
remember where the day had gone. "I don't understand what you're saying."
"Five days ago you went to Oziri's tent after we sparred, and since then
you've been different."
I frowned. "I know you think I'm angry, but I'm not."
"I didn't say you were angry. I said you were different."
"And bitter, you said. Vicious, even. Just because you can't match me in the
circle."
Lines creased her brow. "What are you talking about?"
"The match earlier today. You were losing. You got angry. You quit on me, Del.
You threw down your sword and walked away."
Astonishment was manifest. "I have never walked away from a match in my life!"
"Earlier today," I insisted. How could she have forgotten?
Del recoiled. Pale brows knit together. I saw surprise and worry. "But we
didn't. . ." She changed direction. "Was that your dream?"
"It wasn't a dream, bascha."
She shook her head slowly, as if trying to work out a multitude of thoughts.
"There was no match earlier." Almost absently, she added, "Something's wrong.
Something inside you."
I found it preposterous. "Del "
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She overrode me. "We haven't sparred since that first time, Tiger. Five days
ago. That's the only time we've sparred. Five days ago. Two days after you got
here."
I gritted my teeth, verging on frustration. "Earlier today," I repeated. "We
had an argument in the circle, as we sparred. You quit on me."
Del sat back, putting distance between us. Astonishment had faded. Now she
stared.
Examined me. Evaluated. Comprehension crept into her eyes. "Tiger ... we need
to leave this place. We need to go."
"Oziri says "
"I don't care what Oziri says!" She lowered her voice with a glance at the
open doorflap.
"We have to leave. Tomorrow, first thing."
"You're not ready to leave, bascha. You need to rest."
"You need to get away from here," she countered. "And I've rested enough.
Trust me."
Oziri had said that. Trust me.
"There are still things I have to do," I explained. "Things I
need to learn. Oziri says "
Del pronounced an expletive concerning Oziri that nearly made my ears roll up.
With crisp efficiency she began to gather up her belongings. "We're going.
Tomorrow."
"I'm not done learning what I need to know. I realize it's difficult for you
to understand, but there are things about me that are different. Things "
"Yes! Different! Wrong. That's my whole point." Del stopped packing. She moved
close, sat on her heels, reached up to trap my head in her hands. The heels
cradled my temples.
"Listen to me, Tiger. To me, not to the things Oziri has put in your head. Or
to what you believe happened." Her eyes caught my own and held them. "You're
right: I don't understand this dream-walking. But what I do know is that it's
changing you. You spend most of each day inside your own head. You don't hear
anything I say. You answer no questions. You don't even acknowledge I'm [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]